Coaching Emotional Intelligence: Stay Out of Trouble!
Have you ever said to yourself, ‘Here come’s trouble?’ Maybe you were realizing at the time that you were in the wrong relationship. Maybe you had just lost a job or a friend. Coaching emotional intelligence assists the client whatever their reason, to spot trouble and help you stay out of it?
Warning: Coconuts need to be handled with care.
Let me share with you this story. On a hot summer day, my mother brings home a coconut. I grab it from the kitchen table and place it to my ear. I shake it side to side back and forth. I can hear its yummy juice flowing inside. Mmm, this is so cool! I’m 8 years old.
Excited, I run to the garage and pick up a hammer. What else can we do with a hard coconut? I pin the coconut down with one hand and hold the hammer in the other. Bam! Every time the hammer comes down, this ‘fur ball’ rolls away from me. I get angry.
Summoning all my willpower, I make contact so hard the shell explodes and pieces of coconut go flying in all kinds of directions.
Needless to say, no one tasted coconut juice that day. So yes, I do agree coconuts need to be handled with care.
What’s the deal with the ‘tough’ shell?
Are you like me? I grew up in an environment where a ‘tough’ shell was required for survival. Feeling constantly rejected, I learned at an early age to hide my true feelings and emotions to protect myself. I played ‘tough’ on the outside, and I did not want anyone to see the real me.
However, every time I believed like I did not fit in or belong, it was as if I was hit in the chest like this coconut. At first, I might pretend like nothing happened and I did not care what others thought of me. But that was not true. When my hurt got the ‘best’ of me, I usually exploded in a fit of anger and demanded to be right on the spot. The worst was when I reached the point of ‘Who cares anyway?’. At that point, I most likely hid my face in my pillow, in tears, feeling utterly alone. In these moments, I kept thinking hopelessly, ‘Who will ever be there for me?’
‘To a person armed only with a hammer for a tool, everything looks like a nail.’
Constantly believing I needed to protect myself from the outside world, I unconsciously adopted a whole bunch of false beliefs like;
• ‘The world is a bad place.’
• ‘Can’t trust anyone.’
• ‘I’m not good enough.’
• ‘Nobody cares anyway.’
Until I started down the path of personal development and became more “emotionally intelligent”, I did not understand these false beliefs prevent us from cracking our shell open and feeling loved and wanted.
As a matter of fact at that time before my training and exploration of Coaching Emotional Intelligence psychology, I did not even understand we have “false beliefs”. I mean, if we believe something, if we feel emotions about something, is it not true? This is one of the fascinating questions we explore in Coaching Emotional Intelligence. This gift of intelligently exploring your emotions is a powerful process that will help you unleash your potential and break down those barriers that stand in your way.
How does Emotional Intelligence Coaching work?
With coaching emotional intelligence, the coach will assist you in gently learning to question where you’re false beliefs come from (what got you into trouble). From a compassionate space within, you will have the choice to adopt and apply a different set of beliefs that might be more aligned with your heart. Imagine living a life where
• You feel and believe you matter.
• You feel deserving of love and compassion.
• You can give love and compassion.
• You can receive love and compassion.
• Your voice empowers, uplifts, and inspires.
• You only feel responsible for your feelings and emotions.
• You create your own happiness, which has a ripple effect.
Reaching for what matters to you
For me, I do not have to imagine anymore… I am living my life fully. As for you, if you want more out of life if you want to move past false beliefs about yourself, to reach your dreams and live with passion Emotional Intelligence coaching maybe the right path for you also.
Posted with special permission from the author:
Anne Beaulieu C.E.I.C